The End of an Era

This is a post from my Google blog.

So, of course, it is the end of an era. The end of my freshman year has come and I still feel like I'm just getting used to life here at Yale. Perhaps I'll never be used to it. Perhaps my unrest is due to other large changes in my life that happen independent of a school year.

It's strange to think how much less sure I have become of everything since I arrived on campus.

Sure, I became sure that I HATE philosophy. I became sure that I am awful at Ping Pong. I became sure that having friends is the most important thing in the world.

But on the other hand, I became so unsure of what I want to do with my life. I imagined being a doctor with my white picket fence around a loving home in a small town, but I've learned that nothing is sure. I have been given a wake up call and I know now that nothing is as it seems. You never count on things staying the same. When you think they will, everything gets turned on its head and the only thing you can do is continue on. I learned:

Yale is not filled ONLY with uber-intelligent over-committed type-A's.

Getting a B is not the end of the world. There are so much bigger things to worry about.

The person you're with now may not be the one you will be with in the future, no matter what you want.

I cannot control everything.

Some choices can't be made by other people, and sometimes you make wrong choices.

This may all seem obvious to everyone reading, but to me, these are the most important lessons I have learned this year. I only hope that my mantra "everything happens for a reason" rings true in my sophomore year.

On a brighter note, I have accomplished so much this year that I never thought I could do. I rose the ranks in several organizations and will be holding leadership positions next year. I succeeded in some of the hardest classes I've ever experienced. I became comfortable enough with myself and I joined a sorority regardless of my preconceived notions of them (one of my best decision EVER-- I love you, girls). I danced without caring who was laughing at me because I wanted to! I cried and admitted that I needed help to my new found friends. I made new friends. I got to the point where I'm so sad to leave my world here that I'm not sure if I want to be home.

This summer should be a interesting one. One of my friends wrote a note about the strangeness that will be encountered when we all return home to our old lives and old friends. I am sure I will feel out of place, but I know and love my friends from home and I know they will welcome me back. I have great opportunities to explore this summer! I will be writing case study papers for the pediatric oncology unit at Gundersen (probably about some of my friends -- weird). I will be working at the pharmacy one or two days a week. I will be taking statistics at UWL. I will be learning new and interesting things about myself and life.

This year has been an interesting one, for the most part good. I can't say I have no regrets, but I can say that I know what I want to change in the future. Most of all, though, I will miss being able to say, "It's ok, I'm only a freshman," and have everyone understand and excuse my behavior. :)

Thanks so much for all your support this year!

--me

Yikes! Long time, no blog...

This is a post from my google blog.

Hey everyone,

I s'pose this is a strange time to be blogging considering I was just home, but I realized how behind I am...

Firstly, Parents' Weekend was soooo nice. The fall stretch of school is so long and it's nice to be able to break it up with a visit from the familiar. My parents even let me sleep in the comfortable bed at the hotel! Ah, a good night's sleep... We were super busy and the weekend wasn't long enough. We went to some great restaurants, went to meet the sorority girls, met with the Stiles Master, and went to one of my sister's improv comedy shows. It was a really busy weekend. We also went to go see Flags of Our Fathers which was intense but really good.

The next weekend, Stiles had a busy schedule. Friday night was a crazy Girl Talk concert. Girl Talk is an amazing DJ and if you haven't heard of him, you should check him out. He's a biomedical engineer by day and DJ by night... amazing concert! I was dancing on stage it was so good! Saturday night was Casino Night, rated in the top college parties by Rolling Stone. It was an amazing transformation from Dining Hall, to Concert Venue, to Casino! Everyone got all dressed up and was given chips at the door to gamble with. You could enter raffles with the "money" you made. I was working, so I didn't actually gamble at all, not that i would know how to anyway... It was really fun and I got married in the Little White Chapel (see facebook pictures).

*News Flash* Hayley went to a sporting event! Because Harvard was being dumb about the tailgate alcohol policy, the Princeton game became the focus of the most tailgating fun! I had a great time hanging out with my sorority sisters and all my Stiles friends. We were winning up until the fourth quarter when Yale essentially gave up and Princeton won... arghhhh... we could have held the Ivy Title to ourselves....

Not only did I go to ONE sporting event, I went to TWO! The Harvard game was the weekend that Thanksgiving Break started and I went to Boston on the bus. Although the tailgate was lame, the game was amazing. Yale won 34 to 13 and everyone rushed the field at the end. This would have been fine except that it was probably a 10 foot drop or more to the field so you basically had to jump and hope someone was there to catch you. My hands were bleeding from the concrete and one girl broke her leg, but it was still amazing!

After a freaky night alone in the dorm, I was on my way home for an amazing break! I watched Gilmore Girls with my mom, went and picked up Matt at school, went to Aquinas and saw all my old teachers, spent time with my family on Thanksgiving, and had a great reunion party with all of my friends. It was as if I never left.

Now I'm back on campus with two weeks of tough work ahead of me, one week of "Reading Week" where I'll finish one final paper and study for one final, and then my finals week of only one final. Then, thank goodness, I'll be back home. Wow. One eighth of my college career done. Oh, wait, I'm thinking of going to medical school... I'm not even CLOSE to being done... :P

Love you all and miss you!

Hayley

Updating is time consuming...

This is a post from my google blog.

So, I began updating this the other day. In fact, I had an entire entry almost done and then my computer randomly restarted... It's possessed, I swear...

Anywho... this probably won't be as long as the one I lost because that's too much time that I don't have a midterm...

CLASSES:

Intro to Chemistry: I scored far above the mean on my first test YAY and I like this class better now that I'm realizing it's the only one that I can study to control my grade, the only objective one... Oh, lab's fun too but I really hate writing the reports up... speaking of... I have to do that...

Intro to Cognitive Science: This class is really interesting, but I'm not really sure how to study for the mid term tomorrow... I hope the studying I did was sufficient...!

Life: Philosophy is basically bullshit... you sit around and think about thinking. The only thing I've learned is how to back up my opinions, or rather, seeing that there has to be a reason for what I believe. It's going all right. I got and average grade on my first paper, but I suppose that's not too bad considering my professor is known as being the hardest grader at Yale. I'm taking this class Credit/D/Fail for now so there's really no pressure.

English Writing Seminar: Well, I got a pretty good grade on my first paper. The class focuses on the "mind and the world" mostly through the Matrix. This means that I no longer have any desire to see, think, or talk about the Matrix EVER AGAIN! I have a paper due for that that I should be doing right now...

ACTIVITIES:

I am no longer writing for the music magazine because with the name change to Volume came a format change and I'm not really into the new ideas for the articles (features only). I did go to the Yo La Tengo concert. It was amazing! So fun! Also, I didn't get into an a cappella group, and thank god, because I have far too much on my plate as it is...

Kappa Kappa Gamma Sorority: I know, right? Never would have expected it myself... But the Greek life here is so low key. No hazing. Only one night a week mandatory commitment. Plus, the girls are great! I have so much fun being a pledge for Kappas. I am always looking forward to the next event. Oh, by the way, if anyone has been watching Millionaire and saw a Yale student, that was my sorority sister Shani! She won 50,000 dollars!! Yay Shani!!!

Intramural Ping Pong: I suck, that's all there is to say... LOL.

Urinetown Assistant Stage Managing: The show is AMAZING! The actors and production people here are soooo good! I know why I didn't get in! My director is the developer/director of The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee!!! I am so amazed at the people you can connect with here!

Colleges Against Cancer: Wednesday is paint campus pink day all across the country, so don't forget to wear pink!!! I am involved in the Survivorship committee. We are working to create a support system for those on campus who are affected directly and indirectly by cancer. At this point there is NOTHING for people who just need someone to talk to. I am also, through my faculty advisor who is at the Med. School, working with their brand new survivorship clinic and program to integrate the two campuses and move forward with survivorship resources and opportunities to work with local cancer patient! It's a very exciting time to be involved in CAC because we are still in the developing stages.

CURRENT EVENTS:

Master's Teas: The Master's (heads) of each residential college brings in a special guest about once a month to give a small talk/q&a. I went to the one I talked about before (the stem cell liaison to the UN) and recently I was also able to go to one with one of the writers/producers of Boston Legal!!! I LOVE that show! He was talking about what television production/writing is like, gave sneak peeks into what will be happening on the show, and even told us that he aspires to write like the Gilmore Girls show writers! For all you who make fun of me for watching Gilmore Girls, I TOLD you it had amazing writing!! Tomorrow, Eric Whitacre is coming to a Master's Tea!!! He is one of the most amazing choral composers of our time in my opinion. Boz already asked me to get an autograph for him... I'm soooo excited!

Dances: Silliman recently had their infamous Safety Dance, an 80s extravaganza for the whole campus! We first met up at Shani's place for a bit of fun before the dance then moved on to Commons for an amazingly elaborate dance complete with lighting effects and everything (see pictures). It was a crazy night, but I'm not going to post about it on here, so ask. ;) Also, we recently had our Stiles/Morse Screw dance which is a double blind date dance where your roommates set you up with someone else through their roommates and they make you find each other in goofy ways. For example, one girl had to stand on Old Campus with two baseballs while her date went around asking everyone he saw, "Have you seen my balls?"... yeah... we're really mature. I set Rolake up with Vidur from downstairs. Rolake had to pretend to be a frog and Vidur was dressed as a lillypad and had to lay out on O.C. Rolake had to hop to find him. It would have been hilarious, but Vidur was lame and wouldn't lay down, and Rolake already knew who her date was so she barely hopped and just went up to him. My date was Ryan from downstairs. He's really nice and has a girlfriend so it was perfect. We both already knew we were each other's date so it was lame in that we didn't have to do anything goofy. The dance was a bit awkward in the way school dances always are, but it was still a fun night!

Drowsy Chaperone: Stiles and all the colleges frequently have raffles for tickets to various events in the surrounding areas, including NYC. I recently entered one for free tickets and transportation to NYC to see The Drowsy Chaperone on Broadway!! I won!! Yay! It was nominated for 5 Tony's and won 2. It was HILARIOUS! It was so strange to just go to New York City on a whim. It is such a big deal at home to have gone to NYC... It was really surreal. Oh, by the way, I had a celebrity sighting in NYC. The girl who plays Haley on One Tree Hill was having a conversation right where we were waiting for our bus! It was really cool, but I decided to suppress my dorkiness and not take a picture...

Overall, I've been really homesick. Like everyone I've talked to, I feel like I don't belong all the time. I am starting to find my place, however, and things are falling together nicely. I'm learning that a B is good and that a C is average and I shouldn't be ashamed of them as a freshman. I'm learning that you have to make serious compromises when living with other people. I'm learning that finding people you can confide in isn't always so easy. I'm learning. That's what I'm here for after all...

Off to get stuff done, as usual...

<3>

Opening Days

This is post from my google blog.

Hey all!

Here I am in my dorm room looking out at the New Haven Green. I am still in awe that I'm here. I have experienced so much already!

I started out with three days in the car... I'll post some amusing pictures of me and all my crap in the car on my facebook when I get the chance. I got to see my grandparents and other family in Chicago, so that was great! It turns out that my cousin Marisa is working at Yale for a while this year, so we can go out to dinner or something if I get really homesick. The second night we stayed in State College, Pennsylvania, home of Penn State. It was fun because we got upgraded to a really nice suite in the hotel! I wish I could have that as a dorm room!

The first night in New Haven my parents and I went to PePe's Pizza, world famous and claim they are the first pizza place in America! It was soooooo good!!! Too bad it's pretty far from campus... special treat perhaps...

I then left for FPC, FreshPerson Conference. Way to be politically correct, eh? Two of my roommates, Eva and Lisa, were there too. We got to meet freshman, talk to upperclassmen, see comedy and a cappella groups, hear speeches and panels, all while enjoying the features of a quintessential summer camp, cabins and all. I met some really fun people there. I also saw some really interesting things... including a naked junior guy streaking down the dock and into the water! It was crazy cold, too!

I had it the best! Because we didn't get back to campus until about 2pm, my parents had all my stuff upstairs to the third floor and practically moved in for me! They had also gone on an Ikea and Urban Outfitters run and essentially furnished our common room. Ours is the nicest I've seen so far. I am sooo grateful. My Uncle Jim, who lives about 30 minutes away, and my dad lugged all the furniture up and my mom lugged all my stuff up! I totally owe them! Our suite is one of the biggest on Old Campus, which is where almost all the freshman live. There are four singles and one double which results in six girls to one shower, but we'll figure it out. It has high ceilings, great windows with great views and a convenient back staircase that leads directly to the laundry room. Sadly, there's no fireplace, sorry Karl...

On Friday, we got to meet the Master of my residential college (Ezra Stiles) and his wife the Associate Master! They are so cool! She's adorable and and already knows me pretty well so hopefully I'll get to be her master's aid and get to plan the parties in the BEAUTIFUL house. Their art collection = amazing. I also met my dean, Dean Wood, who is the person who does the class advising for our residential college.

We registered, and then talked to our freshman counselors who are sort of like RAs except that they aren't looking to, and actually can't, get you in trouble. Angelique is soo sweet, and she's really knowledgeable, especially for pre-med stuff considering she's applying to med schools right now. We've already had to call on her for assistance with a drunk roommate that I won't name... She took her to the Health Services and was really cool about it.

My roommates are all really nice. Eva is from New Haven. She's really a sweet person. Lisa, who shares the double with Eva, is really spunky. She's from Houston and Ontario, long story... Steph is adorable. She's an national level figure skater from Salt Lake City, and no, she's not Morman. Rolake and Lea are probably the girls I relate to the most. Rolake is from New York. She's sweet and goofy, and really likes just hanging out. She went on a Target run with my parents and I. Lea is great. She's got AWESOME music taste and brought along her Canon Digital Rebel (Anna, Dawn and Sammy, it makes me want mine here! You would go crazy with all the beautiful picture opportunities!). She's low key but really fun! She's also right across the hall from me so that's fun too!

On Saturday morning, we had our freshman assembly in Woolsey Hall. It was magnificent, a high painted ceiling reminiscent of the Sistine Chapel, Wood paneling, an organ 3 stories high at least! The Masters and Deans and other important people filed in with their robes billowing behind them, Harry Potter style! It was AMAZING. The President and Dean of Undergraduate Studies spoke and it was great!

Last night, I went to a party in a room on the first floor called The Lair. It was really fun and chill. We went on to go to the luau party at the frat house, but Lea and I decided there were too many people, too crazy, so we turned back. I spent the later part of that night trying to clean up after my sick roommate, which I did NOT want to do... O well, hopefully it's just first week stuff and it will get better when classes start.

Today we had the Activities Bazaar. It was crazy. A whole quad was covered in booths and screaming people trying to attract freshman and others to their particular group. I signed up for a few, but managed to keep it down to an ok amount. I am thinking of rushing only the co-ed a cappella groups. If I don't get into one, I'm not going to care too much because they sort of take over your life... You do get free travel all over the country and world though! I also signed up for writing for the Gunslinger, Yale's music magazine which is just getting it's start. I signed up with the Yale Daily News (think Rory) and the Yale Herald to maybe be a music writer. I also talked to the Ski Team, and am really excited for that! Every year they take a trip to, I think, Montreal for the last week of Christmas Break to go skiing and party. Sadly, I will be getting my wisdom teeth out this year. I plan to race with them in Vermont on weekends during second semester though! Exciting! I am also contemplating rushing sororities. They aren't like typical ones though. They don't through parties, the frats do that, they don't haze, they give gifts instead, and they aren't snotty and elitist, only 10% of Yalies are Greek and the sororities are known for their philanthropy, especially the one I'm looking at, Kappa Kappa Gamma. I am also eager to get involved in theater here considering they have the #3 best College Theater opportunities in the country! Wouldn't it be cool if I got into Urinetown!?!

I've avoided having to take the Spanish placement exam, and shopping period starts on Wednesday. We get to "shop" classes to see if we like the class and the professors. It's great! We have that for two weeks, but I pretty much know what I'm taking. I'll let you know when I'm sure.

I had to say goodbye to my parents today, and that was really hard. As long as they were here, it didn't sink in that I wasn't going to be home for a long time... I loved high school, Aquinas, La Crosse, and my life the past few years, and I am really going to miss it. I hope you all are still going to want to be my friend when I get back!

I think I am going to go and relax on the Old Campus Green before I start to get upset... I miss you all! Keep in touch, OK?

Hayley